Just drift or die tryin.

So recently I attened my very first Formula D competition held in Long Beach Ca 4/11/09. It was great. I saw tons of teams competing and witnessed a lot of activity which made me feel left out. So much was occuring, everyone was doing something. It felt good being there and a steady thought kept reoccuring in my head. I asked myself over and over.." How badly do I want to drift?". Seeing Justin Pawlak in his Rx7 and Mike Essa in his FC3S competing on a professional level made me want to be involved so much more. I even remember a remark Justin Pawlak made one day as we were hanging out at his old shop a few years back in East LA...he said something regarding my level of passion for drifting and how Im a dedicated "enthusiast"...and not a driver pursuing the drift motorsport. Wow!!! This thought as painful as it sounded when I initially heard it, still serves as a constant reminder present day. How badly do I want to drift? I recently tried letting go of my 1974 Mazda Rx3. ( Im keeping her though, so it all good) The money from this would help me afford a helmet, extra tires for practice, some shoes for practicing in (mine are totally beat) and finally a much needed camera for capturing my driving. That plan failed and so I stll think about money, what I cant afford to practice and actually compete. Im not going to let go of my vision. I have to keep going. Painful thought's of money wasted in the past on ridiculous things and moments constantly tear away at me. In ending, Im going to drift/drive. Regardless of what Ive been through and how other's might perceive me, Im going to do it.